clair filmer

I loved Claire Filmer
I was nine years old and completely in love
she was tall and beautiful
and I used to walk home from school the long way
round
just to be with her
and I think that once we held hands

I can’t remember her ever talking
just those lovely eyes and incredible smile
the way she put her hand over her mouth when she laughed

we walked home in the snow at the peak of our unstated love
throwing snowballs and running
laughing loudly as we went

and all that time that rock sat waiting

waiting for millions of years
just for this moment
waiting to be covered in snow in such a fashion
that it resembled a ready-rolled snowball
(which you do sometimes find)

and when that rock cracked into the side of her head
my heart cracked along with it

things were never the same after that
and it was not long before she emigrated to Australia

Taken from “Journals of a Jobseeker”